The other day I got a text that lead me to a strange realization.
My coworker texted me asking if I was okay because it seemed like I was sad at work that day. And that was when so many things raced into my mind.
Because the thing is, I’m generally an optimistic and positive person. And the day she texted me, it just felt like any other day. So I immediately came to the conclusion that:
Oh no I’m becoming an adult.
What do I mean by that? Well from what I know, people tend to be unhappy the older they get. I can’t think of one person at the moment who is happier as an adult than when they were a kid.
I also think about how our optimism in tough situations decreases the older we get. Like if a child was going through a difficult long term situation and an adult was going through the same thing, I’m pretty sure the child would be more confident in knowing that things will get better.
And that’s what troubles me.
Because I want to stay optimistic, but from what it looks like the odds are stacked against me.
My conclusion to why this happens is because of a variety of reasons but these are a few that stand out to me.
As a child, you go through life not caring at all what others think. But slowly you start to absorb the judgements of loved ones, and the world, which makes an impact on you. This is where you get so many messages from your environment enforcing what’s acceptable and what’s not. Now, these messages become your filter on how you see others and how you judge yourself. This is when you set the bar too high for yourself and for others around you which allows you to never achieve “success”.
2. The Rat Race
This is when you work for someone else or even yourself because that’s one way you feel like you can fit into this mould that society has made for everyone. And from there you struggle to achieve life goals that aren’t really your own. You basically do the same thing as everyone else and just try to be the best at it. So you make these goals or others make it for you, and it’s all done through the filter of
Obviously you have more responsibility. Money isn’t made by your parents anymore but now you’re in charge of that. And sometimes that can be a burden for some that contributes to their unhappiness. And I know for me and so many others, we’re all lost in this craze of “what’s next”. How are we going to go from step A to step B. And that was honestly not a worry we had in childhood because the next step was just more school.
From these points and some more research, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s these filters that result in unhappiness. Over the decades the “American Dream” has shifted from a house, a steady job, and a family. And is now instant fame and money. This all comes from the exposure of reality TV to social media stars that went from ordinary people to those in the limelight.
It seems that everyone now values money and material items over a family
We also have to keep in mind that we change and mature as time goes by and trying to do things that once made you happy might not still make you happy. We can’t relive our past because we are meant to move forward and not in circles. Although, we should ignore all the white noise society makes and look deep inside and find out what we truly want.
On my next post which will be 2 weeks from now, I’ll delve deeper into my thoughts on how to combat unhappiness for the long term.